Sunday, December 28, 2008

Jean Ann Thank You - My Hero. I'm Going To Be Here For You

Today has been more than a let-down, it has been downright depressing. It's not like I had anything to be unhappy about. Nothing I can even put my finger on... I had an absolutely wonderful Christmas. I've been on a spiritual high, family thankfulness, and deep appreciation for all my family, especially all my husband does for me. Is it because it's over? Tree's still up and decorations.

My head is mush. Steve and I slept most of today. I did see a terrific movie that made me cry, called August Rush. Dave and Larin received it as a gift. It had a amazing new story. Mostly, however, I tried to get well. It was sleeping / waking / coughing / sleeping, again.

It bothers me I'm missing important insurance receipts, I lost Kiely's school CD for her Spanish class and they weren't cheap and she HAS to have them found for this semester. And, I was missing the cable to my MePC, but I walked out of bed and right to it at 2:00a this morning. That was weird. Steve said he felt the same way today and is taking sick days off. You can't have a muddled mind in his work as a firefighter and the BIG decisions might not be within his reach today. I'm glad that the city has some sick days. The citizens should be grateful, also.

When one of my daughters have a migraine (she's had them since she was very, very young) She says my head feels like melted butter and I'm there.

New revelation: I figured it out at 6:00p that I'm sad for my best friend. Very sad. I'm not trying to think of something to match my depression--this isn't a pity-party. Here I am, okay as far as I know, and looming in the very, very near future my friend is going to have a huge operation. It is the breast cancer in her that has me upset. I feel guilty happy.

I called her. She's so my hero. I can't believe what a completely wonderful attitude she has. Jean Ann told me she has thousands praying for her and she feels their comfort and all will be well. She's motivated to sing and exercise, actually she's going to go sing at another friend's birthday party. Giving herself and losing her sadness. She has faith overflowing. I completely did an about face. We really talked a lot she wanted me not to worry. We set goals together, laughed about how weird life is for us right now.

A letter came today, I was handed the mail after I talked to Jeanie. The missionary that taught me about the Church, Lee Jewkes, past-away in March. Elder Jewkes blessed my life so much and was so worried that because I joined the Church in just a week, that I would fall away. We kept in contact. Elder Jewkes, with his Priesthood gave me the Gift of the Holy Ghost on Feb. 25th almost 40 years ago. Thank you dear elder for sacrificing so much to go on a mission and find me. I will never forget you and hope to meet you on the other side. I know angels came for him and he's truly in heaven, I know that. I can only smile when I think of him.

I'm going to be different. I'm going to carry an umbrella for my friend, Jean Ann. I want to be a support and prayers.

Psalms 112:7

"He shall not be afraid of evil tidings: his heart is fixed, trusting in the LORD."

Psalms 56:3

"In God have I put my trust: I will not be afraid what man can do unto me."

The scriptures are so full of wonderful quotes on faith, hope and trusting in the Lord. I need to read my scriptures so much more often.
Breast Cancer, Faith, Hope, Trusting The Lord

4 comments:

WatsonFamily said...

Thank you mom for this post. I am sorry you are sad and I am sorry that Elder Jewkes has passed away. It is neat to think of all the lives he blessed through his mission. You joining and then on to us kids and our kids and the people Dustin taught on his mission and the many, many more.

And Jeanie has my prayers....I love her and I know with all of her friends and family she will have great strangth.

I love you Mom!

jenkinsfamliypost said...

you are sweet mother. i love you too!

jeanie said...

OH SUSAN...
i just talked to marnie...she asked how i was doing. i told her i was concerned about YOU. and that i realized that MY NEWS, has affected YOU.
when i heard the diagnosis...i knew this would be really hard on so many of my dear friends, (who are really my sisters.) i soooo regret that i had to share this news. and that's why i waited to even tell my friends and family, until i was sure. i didn't want to worry them needlessly.
the day i revealed this,...i was aware how troubled you were because you came over to the ranch 2 times in one afternoon. why should i be surprised by your love, devotion, and caring attitude...??? we have been the BEST FRIENDS since KINDERGARTEN, for heaven's sake ! well over 50 years.. ( : we have shared so much of our lives together.
susan...do you remember that YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS NOT AFRAID OF ANYTHING? LOL you crack me up. i was the one hiding behind YOU when 'babe' came at us in a full run! she was avoiding being caught and ridden.
that use to scare me to death. you would just stand straight up and tall..and just slap her on the nose when she would roll right into you. she would bluff soooo bad. and you always ended up riding her. you were always my 'cowgirl' HERO. i think you could ride a BULL to this day. and NOT BE AFRAID. it's true isn't it? i know it is.
you are not afraid of anything. remind yourself, what a 'bull dog' you are. ( :
YOU will remain strong...you have always been the stronger one. i just am here to remind you of that fact!
i will try and stay brave as i go through this health issue.
no promises tho. i am NOT ~~SUSAN WELLMAN LAZENBY !!! ~~
AND THE PRAYERS...oh my...they are giving me the greatest peace, that helps me remain hopeful for a complete healing.
i sure appreciate your family and the prayers they offer in my behalf. it DOES make the difference. it truly does.
i feel honored by you, that you wrote about me in your blog. thanks so much for your concern..and L0VE...AND know that i love being with you every single second !!!
I WILL ALWAYS FEEL SOOOO INDEBTED TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY FOR ALLOWING ME A BIT OF YOUR LAND FOR MY FARM ANIMALS !! i had no other options...what in the world would i have done if you hadn't offered this to me. i would have had to given up my sweet pets.
thanks soooo much to all of you...even your mother had to allow me to come on the property every single day. that's a big deal now that i am a property owner.
you are a loving and caring friend...and a good example to ALL.
and susan.. i WILL be alright. i promise !!! LOL
I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART. NO ONE COULD LOVE A FRIEND MORE THAN I LOVE YOU.
jeanie

Betty said...

Dear Susan,
Jeanie shared your family site with me. I hope it's ok to leave a comment. I feel I'm kind of intruding. Let me first say..I love your site. Really. Love your words, thoughts, pictures...just the look of the site. What a good idea!

About Jeanie...the feelings you expressed are shared..and were a perfect description. She is on my heart. My nephew works for the Cancer Schmancer Movement and gave important, encouraging information. Most importantly, she has her own legion of "prayer warriors".

Wishing you and yours good things in the coming year.
bb