f

Thursday, October 30, 2008

California Prop. 8 I Love Everyone, This is Hard, The Church is True

I don't want to hurt others feelings and I am for equal rights within the law. The scriptures is where we find the definition of marriage, so it is my right...it's my beliefs, that are being taken away if this passes. There are already laws for equal rights for domestic partners. I know that everyone has their right to choose how they live and I'm not judging, at all. Why, when we already defined marriage by law, is this again coming to vote.

I feel I Can express My Freedom of Speech and Religion. I can stand for something.

Rats! I'm Freaked


Oh no, there's a rat in my room and it's chewing on Steve's shoes. He on-duty. Should I call the fire department to catch the rat? I'm sick. It's phobia time. I'm sleeping in Kiely's room....tonight. You know, I could actually post every single day about some strange, random thing here at "Danger Ranch"

I'm still going to soak my face and may stay there until I wrinkle, that would be an improvement. I would put lol right here, but some people hate that acronym. Right about now, I could use just about any gross cuss word and that would work. Uglee Rat!! Ewwww!

Me Uglee, Really Ready For Halloween

Just when you think you are looking better, a little girl in the Doctor's office saw me, eyes big as dollars, and ran screaming and crying to her mother. The CNA nurse told me I must be allergic to the medication. When the Dr. came in, he said, "Nice! All you need is a hatchet and your all ready for Halloween." My grandson, for the first time, had a nightmare last night. He dreamed that I was a Zombie and chasing him around the house. I'm glad he went to school before I came out of my room, today.... Could it get worse? It does, and will.

I could start a remix:
"My lips, My lips.....wha' gonna' do with all tha' space inside your face?"

I'm answering questions about, " Did Steve ask you to shut-up and you thought he said, stand-up?" No, I got in a fight with a ________ just fill in anything that can mess you up. Woverine comes to mind..and it won.

Before anyone says that I'm ungrateful and writes me a pity-party post. I'm honestly grateful and tell my Heavenly Father constantly, how blessed I am to have caught the Cancer before it got worse. So just know--when you think you are having a bad hair day. Hmmm. I wish I had that problem. Please use SPF 50 always and protect your children to avoid getting any sunburn. Stay out of the sun if you're not protected.

Yay, Jaxon! Instead of "Gramma" he growled at me.
I have deja vu of Poison Oak.

I'm thinking, maybe I WILL go to the Halloween "Trunk or Treat" Party at the Church, but I worry that the kids will be crying to their folks on Sunday, "That woman GOT to wear her costume, to Church!"

I just did a search on Google Images to find a face like mine, but not mine. Guess what? None as "good" as mine are there. 50 searches. I think I'll go soak my face.
HEY  YOU  GUYS.......

Monday, October 27, 2008

A Zit Is A White Horse.

Dangit, I look like I've been rode hard, an' put up wet!!
Health issues are sooooo boring. Like telling someone about your dream last night.

I had a very good reason for not going to Church yesterday. My face looks like old man Dickenson hit me in the face with a double-barrel shotgun load of Morton's rock salt!

It's not zits, I wish! Or, not poison oak, I wish! It's the "Big C" and I'm killing it with this freakin' lotion that I can't cover with make-up.

First, the Doctor asked me if I was doing anything in the next few weeks. He told me my skin would be all new again, like a baby's. I thought it was Retin-A stuff. Not! No sunburned skin. I HAVE swollen eyes, swollen lips (the lips, they don't need to be bigger, thank you) and huge hive-like, blisters, all over my face. And PICK! Each one, hurts. Yes, your face is killing me and.... Yes, I am grateful they aren't Frankenstein stitches or worse, radiation and chemo. But, it has become this joke. It is as if, "na, na, nana, na!" Directly to me. Imagine, 6 children and how many others, think this is funny. I should have loved each zit they ever had and took pictures, gave them ice-packs or what do you use for acne? Oh, yeah, heat?

I never had an acne break-out in my life, ever. Those genes are not in my side of the family, so I've never ever gave any sympathy to those who have zits. Actually, I never noticed it on anyone, until I had teenagers of my own that pointed them out and completely freaked-out about them. I feel their pain.

The word "ZIT" is a word I learned from my uncle Dan. I was about 8 or 9 and we were bored on a trip to Colorado to see our relatives. So, to pass the time, and help me get over car sickness...All of us...(7 under my age, in a '57 Ford station wagon with three adults, and no air-conditioning and plastic wrapped seats) We, got a dime for every "Zit" we could find. A zit was a white horse! I remember my aunt Barbara and my mom giggling half the way on our trip.

A "zit" became our trip game for everywhere we went, from then on. I loved getting money and it was fun smacking my siblings when they cheated with a Palomino.

Honestly, I didn't know what a "Zit" was, until I was married and I said, "Steve, there's a zit!" Okay, so NOW, I'm "Zit-face" and it doesn't mean "horse." The bumps are big as hives and are each blisters. Oh Job! How I sympathize with your boils all over you. I'm better today--my face was very swollen yesterday, and today....I have a butt-load, sorry...face load...of wrinkles. Yep, new skin, just like a "baby's behind." No wonder the doctor asked me if I had anything going on. Bad mood, yes. But...I am grateful for my dear doctor who really looks after me. Thank you, Dr. Gary Wikholm. I do appreciate all you do for us. Really. All of this is minor to what it could be. I am at this place called, "empathy."
Ugly on the outside and the inside

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Steve Lazenby Wears Lots of Hats!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Lazenby Lane Wellman Way Car Show. My Dad Saved Every Car and Tractor He Ever Bought

Off Wellman Way, We Are Truck Farmers On Lazenby Lane



















I can't believe these cars are in our circular driveway. It's okay if they get worked on. Dustin's truck has "gone green" it's growing lichens and moss all over it. '56 Ford Pick-up Chia Pet. Might be worth something! My Steve's is the Valiant in the middle, and Dave, my son-in-law just got that DeSoto and it's in such excellent condition, but it looks like it has a dent in my picture, but it's just a shadow from our big Sycamore tree in the middle of the driveway.The DeSoto was free, like in "no money," free, because the fire department was burning the garage down for a drill. Had to get the garage cleaned out and no one wanted a car a "traveler" slept in. lol Free is good, if it doesn't rot-away here on the ranch.


I bought that postcard in Ashford, Arizona at the north gas station. That picture looks like m
y dad and his Model T Ford flatbed, before it went down the Santa Paula Creek in a flood. I think the truck in the postcard is a power wagon. Doesn't matter. That guy is so like my dad, Gene Wellman! My dad's Ford was working, had all it's parts and is what I learned to drive in when I was in 6th grade. The big ol' Ford was navy blue, had gears with compound low. I almost ran over my uncle, Frankie O'Connor, while he was bucking hay on the back. I still don't do reverse well. I know Frankie remembers that day, I didn't tell my dad.

I did not make the new mark on the FJ and that's is absolutely the truth, I promise!

As Grandpa Doug Would Say, "I Love Thee Bree."
























Happy Birthday Bree! We love you and miss
you so much!


Whatta' Day--I Feel Old

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Viewer Discretion Advised, Very Scary!



I'm really trying to get myself past some fears or phobias. The mice weren't available on this day. The snake, named Elvis, just ate them. I was concerned that the snake just might leave some drippings or droppings on my face. Actually, I had a hot flash and the Elvis decided to sleep on my face, that's why I'm laughing. TAKE IT OFF!!


Now, the spider is a whole different story, do NOT do this at home. Since this incident, I found out from a very reliable source (the Internet) these big spiders can bite. This one is very tame, but the hair...Oh no, can shed and they are barbed! A very dangerous thing can happen to your eyes and the spiders shed their hairs often... this spider doesn't really know me. The spider hairs can get in your eyes, even from your hands. So, wash your hands and don't let big hairy spiders walk on your face. Actually, to tell the truth, the spider was so soft walking on me, it felt like a tiny kitten without the claws. It really liked my hair. Is that creepy or what? It looked a an ornament. I decided to spare you the picture. BTW-- The spider lives comfortably in a large spider cage, but loves snuggle in a toilet paper tube. Now, EVERY TIME I put a new roll on the dispenser--I can't help but look inside the roll. You just never know what might be lurking inside, waiting to spring out. Oh, I'm just freakin' myself out....ewwwww

These are just some weird things I do to keep my whole family entertained. I'm not going the "Jackass" route anymore. I AM going to hold a white mouse, maybe with gloves on.
Halloween IS Just Starting

Thursday, October 16, 2008

I'm The One With The Happy Bird Head On. I Kept Running Into The Wall, So I Sat Down















These next few months will be East Wind some call "The Santa Anas" but we're far from there. So, in Spanish, they are "El Solano" That is the name of our high school yearbook and for years, I thought everyone's yearbook was called "El Solano." Lol

New school clothes were always on sale because this is really the hot season.

Larin said she always loved the East Wind until she gets the sniffles from all the plants from here to Utah.

The wind just reminds me of the start of school and being nervous with all my new classes. The two books are ‘our’ El Solanos. Kiely's (she's the cover girl "Jane" not "Joe" Cardinal, as the mascot) and then the yearbook of mine.

The term is just for Santa Paula because it came from a certain southern region in Spain. Actually, it's a south-easterly wind and that’s what happens here, the wind blows up the canyon, swirling toward the north. But, it comes from the north-east desert. I think it just cuts up the Santa Paula Creek area and it is exactly a south-easterly. I don't think that applies to many other places. Spain does have a slope called the El Solano. A Mexican Fort was located at Ojai Rd. and 10th Street during the Mexican American War. Makes sense that someone would think that the winds come from the south-east.



Fires start all over and it seems that happens every season. The firefighters look forward to the overtime and the wives and husbands worry, when "their" firefighter goes out on a Strike Team. I don't think the overtime is worth it, but if they didn't receive overtime, all of us wouldn't make it living in California.

Strike Team Time It's almost a reunion/camping/slumber party for the firefighters. I do know it's hard work and really terrible in our mountains, well anywhere. It's so scary. Doesn't that picture of the Ranch Incident in Upper Ojai look like a "Beast?" There are horns, eyes, nose, teeth, mouth,cheeks, fangs, a beard, and...an arm....Oh! The flame is HUGE!! That is an Art Bell picture and one fireman on the strike team with my husband, took that picture with just an Instamatic Camera. I've heard it called the "Devil Wind" so there you go. A big Devil.

A wind storm takes anything that isn't tied-down and whatever it takes it goes far away. I always worry about our Oak Trees breaking. The fire alarms in the house keep getting set off....well, actually all over town. Dust is—well, our personal homestead could be called a dust-bowl. Fur-sure!

The East Winds Are Blowing Again...Fall Is Here

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

So Who's Surprised? Take Personality Test Online


Do you take personality tests online or email, just to see who you really are? When I was in high school and "Seventeen Magazine" was about the only magazine that was popular. I always took the quizzes and okay...so the stuff they say about you is right, because it fits everyone. Just like horoscopes. I used to save those....a whole years worth of our weekly papers ("if this is your birthday today....") of course, it wasn't ever my birthday, but they all went along with me. I could really go for what was said, even about someone else.

http://twilightersanonymous.com/ (the test)

I'm not Bella! I took that the test from the movie "Twilight" over and over, changed all the answers, and still, I came out Bella. Is it how you type...fast or slow? How many mistakes? Actually, I'm not any of the characters, well, maybe Irina, because that character jumps to conclusions and I do that frequently. But, Irina was not an option.

So my friend sends me a DNA personality test, can this be REAL? Pick flashing pictures and your answers are in a little book. lol That's me, an open book. And there's a narrative. Just make-up your own, to go with the pictures, any will do....if they are angelic.

Look at the pictures? OOPS! I had to use my own because all their little pictures were just not me. Oh, my favorite drink is not on there. What would I like? None of the above. Do I look like I like bars? Maybe one bar and it's a restaurant, but the restaurant has a lounge (kids can go in)...but it's only to see my friend sing and I don't stay long and I don't DRINK! True guys!

So, now I ask you....This has been the most time consuming blog I've ever done and I can't get those pictures in the right order of importance. Can you see me? The real me?

Make-up your own mind about me, it doesn't matter. I can't get these in order, but I wanted the Savior to be first, and then our family, and the temple and so on. So...a picture is worth a thousand words, here's thousands.

Try the road sign. Confused yet? So am I.

Do you see Scoots, my favorite friend from 5 years old until high school? My dear, one-eyed, Cocker Spaniel. He's waving at the camera.


You Can't Figure Me Out---I Can't Figure Me Out . lol

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Wouldn't You Know It? Another Call To My House--From The Fire Department



I'm such a door knob, or is the saying, "Dumb As A Door knob", hmmm, but both are true. Tuesday morning Steve left for work early and let me sleep in just a bit. I'd been up all night, well, until early in the morning for Kiely the "night owl" to drive her body home.

I got up to take my regular morning heart pills-same o' thing everyday, and the door knob was off. That wouldn't usually mean anything, but the door knob was on the other side of the door, meaning it was completely shut. The knob had fallen apart in the middle of the night and I sat it on the bookcase...in the hallway, for Steve to fix. I was, I guess, a way too bit mad at Kiely for keeping me up so long. I may have yanked on the knob harder than usual. But that's NOT a confession. It's one of those century old glass ones that never pull out, until now.

No problemo, I went to the bathroom door and...LOVELY! The door was locked from the other side. That was my only way to escape, the bathroom has another door to the hallway. I couldn't open the window with the air conditioning-motor-thingy, there. Other window...Dang! It's a long ways down. Nice. I painted it shut.

So, I turned on the air conditioning-I needed it by this time. And tried to read, but, I got to that point I HAD to get outta' here! I called my daughters who were marathon-type running in Ventura about 22 miles east, and next to the ocean. I got Kiely's answering machine, "I'm partying right now (blasting music) call me back later." I think I had a real bad, hot-flash and then called again. Regular answering machine--not the party one. She still didn't answer. I waited, I paced, I danced-sorta'. Now, I'm mad at everyone. Not calling Steve, at work. My mom and Marnie that both live next door are gone.

Kiely finally calls me from the mall and I asked her if she could spring me. I was locked in the bedroom. She laid down at the mall and choked herself laughing and couldn't talk. This is rotflol. I heard snorts, yelling, commotion. I hung up. She did manage to tell me later, that the party answer recording that I heard wasn't hers. Sooo, I left some random girl a very weird message and the great thing is...I have caller ID. She probably knows me or Kiely, for sure. Small town.

My husband then just happened to call a few minutes later, from the fire station and said, "What's up?" Dang, busted. I wasn't going to tell him, but he already knew. He was bringing the crew in the fire truck to rescue me, again. More calls to this house than any other in Santa Paula and that's not a joke! It is a true fact, if you would like to read the records. Lovely! I was in my PJs. Hello. "Great Response Time!"

I did look at our door knob today with different eyes, man, if I only get a diamond that big for my birthday. Just a passing thought, yes...I'd sell it.

We found another kitten. Actually, Kiely found it outside all alone while she was riding her horse. It was in one of the corrals crying so hard and all alone. The mom must have moved them and forgot this one. Or moved the others and left this one. I don't know. It was so hot outside still, we brought it in and it really drinks the replacer (you know your a farmer when your own children go on replacer and not formula) I get told often that you are either a "cat" person or a "dog" person. Well, I'm weird, I love both and praying the little kitten makes it. It screams loud when it's hungry and sleeps a lot, so we are hopeful. That mother cat has completely flipped or is she inbred?

Mother's Genes Are Missing, What The Cat Or Me?