Saturday, June 6, 2009

The Blood Curdling Scream That You Hear Morning and Night Is Pure Torture!

A couple days ago an Edison truck (our electric company) pulled in our ranch and just wouldn't let up on the horn. The honking started and I was in the shower and as quick as one can put on her tight jeans and flannel shirt..wet... saunder outside, and with dripping hair; my hunt was on to strangle whatever it was that was making that honking noise. "Dang, Edison! Why don't you call?" The man was changing meters because we have an aggressive dog and the meter needs to be read from....a computer? Yeah, Darby might lick you to death.

My husband owned Sespe Enterprises, the trash service, for the rural areas and cities of Fillmore, Piru, Bardsdale, Santa Paula, and Saticoy. Steve was bit daily. Dogs do not like..."¡Sus botes de basura personales robados!" But our dogs are used to strangers like Mormon Missionaries. Ha ha, they are strange at every transfer. Missionaries love Darby and Little, they usually have a sheep dog or cattle dog or know someone that has one and of course, fetch game reminds them of home. The yellow tennis ball is Darby's favorite toy in whole world. Edison guys carry sticks with "yellow tennis balls."

Darby is fixated (fixytated) on the yellow ball and the Edison guy thinks she going to eat him, so he starts pounding our puppy. Gotcha! "Quit it, she just wants to play!" He quit hitting her, but was watching our dog and not paying attention to our meter. The meter rim was a bit stuck, so he was trying to watch his back, yell at me to get her, and change the meter all at the same time. She just wanted the ball! So, he put new glass case and meter in fast-time, as in opposite of "slow-mo" and turned on the electric power on too fast. It blew-up our water heater!

The Edison dude took off blaring his horn over at Marnie's. I didn't know yet... what he had done. I'm so glad my computer wasn't on or my new TV. But...we have no hot water. None. Actually, it's colder. I LOVE THE WATER HEATER!

Steve was on duty a couple days... but that night, the screaming started. Kiely was screaming from shower and was so mad I thought a Mayfly ("Kid-killer Mosquito") was in there. Kiely was able to hit decibels so high they were out of the reach of human hearing. Our donkeys started yelling in unison. Next it was my turn. You know...I would rather throw-up than take a cold shower... and that's bad. The blood curdling screams actually reverberates off the canyon walls and echoes. Dogs, sheep, goats, horses, donkeys, cats, chickens, and coyotes all join in union. It's so sad for the human's to not have hot water. The sudden surge of cold, cold water from the basement makes my heart flutter and that's not for any love toward the Edison man.

Did you notice the Edison dunking machine? I'm ready. I have a horse tough and a tractor seat, and the handle to hit with yellow tennis balls. The Lincoln Welder helped me so much, I knew Heavenly Father blessed me with that wonderful tool to not actually hurt someone. Just to help me take the "heat" off of his stupid anger. However, I am not adding the fence so the dog can throw balls at the Edison dude before he hits the water that I've slightly frozen to slush. My freezer works. HEEE HEEE. Devil in me.

Ahhhh, I feel so much better. Yeah, Watch The Momma Cats


Breeda said...

Oh Mom....that is such a bummer! Did you let them know that he fried it? I am so sorry!

jenkinsfamliypost said...

that guys was a jerk. i wonder how people like that get a job dealing with the public?????

nikkicrumpet said...

NOT GOOD...I wonder if you'll be able to get the dopey man who broke it to fix it! I can't imagine living without hot water. I'd have to just be dirty because I HATE anything but a blazing hot shower! I think a little froze slush is just what he deserves!