Thursday, December 31, 2009

Happy New Year! Resolutions?

Will I be done by midnight? I hope so. It's so interesting to me that how I can be just a bit "off-tilt" and my balance of life is effected by it all. My swimming has been of hours practicing on my balance as well doing cardio fitness. I've done it for over 6 months. I can't believe it's been that long. To do the balance act I focus on a point and raise my legs to front, side and back. Oh, and also the ankle and across my knee, and then try to sit like in some imaginary chair. The coach sometimes is really on our case and we have to balance and kick-out. It's probably some kind of Tai Chi because I recognize the end hand movement of power. The hardest thing about all this is that we have to close our eyes and still balance. I can only think of ballerinas dancing as they first lean forward and balance their center of gravity and then stand straight-up in perfect posture. This is my goal because I can't do that for very long or even compare myself to a dancer in any way, but I want it. Even if it's oh.... maybe the 3 or 4 year olds. I so appreciate ballerinas dedication, strength, and complete focus, and control of their body.

I think I figured out the secret of life. Actually, that's how I'm going to live my life this year. I always have this one word goal or New Year's resolution. One year it was "serene". I found that a person that has a firemen and 6 children can not possibly be serene unless you are extremely flexible in all things. Changes in just seconds can cause your new found serenity just flying out-the-window.

The next year I decided I'm going to be "flexible" and then try "serene" again the next year. I'm still not there yet. I tried the word "compromise" for Kiely's junior year in high school, that went over like--well it didn't. I tried "acceptance" and last year "courage." I did accomplish that and it felt so good. This year it "balance."

I'm going to be balanced in all things... my physical balance, my system, my homework, my time spent on projects. I can say if I'm balanced and not "tipsy" or never wavering even in my faith, I can manage balance.

My Marine Coach or as we call him, "Drill Sargent" told me it took him more than 6 months to learn to balance on this board that's on a ball, and he did it. It had determination and I'm going to have that, too. Not balance on a ball yet. Our Drill Sargent is not young, but in great physical shape. Dave expects more from me than I can give right now, but luckily I found the scriptures ... Mosiah 4: 27 not requisite that man run faster than he has strength. D&C 10: 4 do not run faster than you have strength. Yes, I love those scriptures because it helps me pace myself and become stronger. It helps me not to hold my breath because of the pain, or try and pant to stop the "not breathing habit". Actually, not breathing is defeating the purpose (non-aerobic exercise) or then the panting causes hyperventilation. Sooooo, there you go. Just pace yourself to what you can do and progress happens, it really does.

Some things that I want to balance is my gardening, my reading, my music, my temple attendance, and yes my health. Balance my organizations meaning be absolutely NOT OCD about writing everything out and inflexible and uncompromising, and then I just ending-up either procrastinating or quitting all together. If I go and label and completely overboard ... writing all this down, then I will have to go out into the "forbidden forest" and take a bunch of pottery in the little red wagon and throw them at the rocks. My favorite stress reliever. Part of that vision that makes me laugh is that when I imagine Archeologists like to find middens. What are they going to think about my trash pile or midden? They have a peculiar job, don't they? Oh, I recommend this activity for everyone that has a place to throw them. Glass isn't good, but the pottery is a very good work-out and doesn't hurt the environment. See really, I'm leaving excellent artifacts for generations to study. I need to write on a couple plates and show a mad woman tossing plates, so the archeologists know I was playing a game.

Ponder this point of danger. I do wear gloves and glasses, protective clothing, but of course you know by now, this is "Danger Ranch" and the threat of the "forbidden forest" is very underestimated by many, especially my grandchildren. There are wild animals trails, poison oak, bushes with ticks, and an occasional traveler (or homeless) encampment living out there. Spooky.
I Pray For More Energy &
That Means I Need To Work For It

Balance, I just yawned. Is this boring? I think balance applies to sleep and rest also. I have had none of that today getting Kiely ready with all her paperwork needed for college. We are leaving after church on Sunday, depending on the weather.

Know what? I just thought of something. I could start getting up earlier in the morning. I could balance my inner energy, my colors, my self-worth. I can think of times negative feeling come into my mind and the cure for that would be let other sweet things enter my mind and the negative would be pushed-out. I like Kiely's hymn, "Scatter Sunshine."

 I love the word Vitality. Vitality... 
even when you say it, it feels good and energetic.

Next Morning:  Okay, this morning I had dreamed about "balance" all night. I was working on a ship, dry-docked, so I could stay balanced and not seasick. I was sweeping as a part-time job to keep the newly sanded floor beautiful for the finishing work. I was chasing grapes downstairs and I realized it was lunch time. I sat on a box and peppered my turkey sandwich with our defective pepper shaker. I can't eat much salt and the pepper is very hard to shake out. Soooo, I shook it very hard. It had sea salt. I remember jumping waves and how great the water felt swirling around my ankles after I leaped over the first foamy line of the wave rising to meet my feet. It was jump-rope in the ocean.I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long. If we're in each other's dreams, we can play together all night.~~Bill Watterson **Calvin and Hobbes**


I worked and played all night and when I woke-up so cold in the morning I realized I shook a whole can of cherry Diet Dr. Pepper on my pillow and sheets and blankets. It was not a "Pepper Shaker" or a "Sea Salt Shaker", it was my Cherry Dr. Pepper! Nice. I didn't even think "PEPPER" (Thank you Bree, it's like a pun, and definitely not intended) I went right back to sleep and dreamed  I was actually shot by a drive-by shooter and all of this is blood. I am dead and know I'm a spirit. I know this is going somewhere so many don't understand...but the soft drink is red. So, just looking at my pillow made me think I was shot. How can I see I spilled the drink and then go right back to sleep and the red soda makes my mind think I'm bleeding on my head.

Dreams permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.~~William Dement

My thinking of death or that I have died in my sleep: Dang! I didn't get to do my goals for the year. Wait......I'm cold. I'm alive, I'm alive! Now... Can I balance my dreams? I'm ready for my swimming exercise this morning, at least it will be warmer than my bed. Nice, I'm resting here and my head is on a whole can of dumped over, cold soda pop.

Sahara Has Balance In Some Things

Sonny Can Tip and Never Fall!
Sonny is Balanced In Other Things?
Basketball, I guess it's a Stud Thing.

So... I'm Random More Than Usual


Breeda said...

Great Post Mom.

I love the Dr. Pepper shaker!! hahaha burrr.

I love you!!!

Susan said...

It was so cold, I had on so many quilts (all red, now) I hate the heater in there because it drys my throat and I can be cozy with lots of blankets. Frozen ones? That was so freaky. Thanks for the comment! Mom

jenkinsfamliypost said...

love you mother. i love the balance for the year. i think we all could benifit from a goal like that.